(Q&A) Is Contributing to House Payments Enough to Count as Financial Support?

Is Contributing to House Payments Enough to Count as Financial Support?

Question:

I have a husband who is a scholar (ustadz). I work at a company and have stayed there. I intend to resign and am currently looking for an alternative job. At the same time, I also have a small business that usually opens only on Saturdays and Sundays. My husband and I run that business together. However, for about the last 3 months, we have lived in separate houses. He went back to his hometown. We had a fight. The issue is, I feel like I am working myself to the bone looking for jobs, even though I am a woman. I haven't left my current job because I have to support my parents' needs. Yet, my husband has not given me any financial support (nafkah) for about 3 years. I even built a business so that he would run it, but he lacks any initiative to manage it. Even when I ask him to work as an online motorcycle taxi (ojek online), he always makes many excuses. I built a kitchen and provided facilities for the business, but marketing the business was not fully carried out by him. In short, I cover all of our needs. I even serve his needs, from food to the bedroom, while I am the only one working. For the past 3 years, I feel like I have been fighting alone. Recently, we fought and I brought up the issue of nafkah. He replied that he contributes to the house payments and that is already considered nafkah. My question is, what exactly is meant by nafkah for the wife of an ustadz? Is contributing to house payments considered providing nafkah? Am I wrong if I file for a divorce against him if he does not support me financially?

Answer:

If what is meant is outward financial support (nafkah lahir), then according to the consensus of the scholars, nafkah lahir for a wife consists of 3 things: food, clothing, and shelter. If the situation is as described, then your husband is still fulfilling only one element of nafkah, which is shelter. Meanwhile, the other two—food and clothing—have not been fulfilled. The obligation to provide this food and clothing sustenance is based on the sermon of the Messenger of Allah during the Farewell Hajj (Hajj Wada’) in front of thousands of Muslims at that time:

أَلَا وَحَقُّهُنَّ عَلَيْكُمْ أَنْ تُحْسِنُوا إِلَيْهِنَّ فِي كِسْوَتِهِنَّ وَطَعَامِهِنَّ

“Know that their right over you is that you treat them well in providing their clothing and their food.” (HR. At-Tirmidzi: 1163 and Ibnu Majah: 1851 from Amru bin Al-Ahwash) (1)

As for the minimum standard of nafkah in the form of food and clothing, it follows prevailing local customs. Imam Ibnu Al-Qatthan Al-Fasi stated:

وَاتَّفَقُوا أَنَّهُ يَلْزَمُ الرَّجُلُ فِي النَّفَقَاتِ مَا يَرْفَعُ الْجُوعُ مِنْ قُوتَ الْبَلَدِ الَّذِي هُوَ فِيهِ وَمِنَ الْكِسْوَةِ مَا يَطْرُدُ الْبَرْDَ وَتَجُوزُ فِيهِ الصَّلَاةُ

“They (the scholars) have agreed that what is compulsory upon a man regarding financial maintenance is to provide food that fends off hunger from the staple food of the land where he resides, and clothing that fends off the cold and is valid to use for prayer.” (Al-Iqna’ fi Masail Al-Ijma’, 2/57)

Regarding shelter, it is based on the word of Allah:

أَسْكِنُوهُنَّ مِنْ حَيْثُ سَكَنْتُمْ مِنْ وَجْدِكُمْ وَلَا تُضَارُّوهُنَّ لِتُضَيِّقُوا عَلَيْهِنَّ

“Lodge them [in a section] of where you dwell according to your means and do not harm them in order to distress them...” (At-Thalaq: 6)

Concerning filing for a divorce or demanding to be divorced (in court) due to the husband's deficiency or inability to provide financial support, it is permissible under Sharia. This is the opinion of the majority of scholars, namely the Malikiyah, Syafi'iyah, and Hanabilah. Imam Bahram from the Maliki school stated:

قَوْلُهُ: (وَلَهَا الْفَسْخُ إِنْ عَجَزَ عَنْ نَفَقَةٍ حَاضِرَةٍ) أَيْ: إِنْ عَجَزَ عَنِ الْإِنْفَاقِ عَلَيْهَا فِي الْحَالِ، فَتُخَيَّرَ حِيْنَئِذٍ بَيْنَ أَنْ تُقِيمَ مَعَهُ أَوْ تُفَارِقُهُ؛ لِقُوَّةِ الضَّرَرِ الَّذِي يُلْحِقُهَا مِنْ عَدَمِ الْإِنْفَاقِ

“His statement, (And for the woman is the right to dissolve the marriage if he is unable to provide immediate maintenance), meaning: if the husband is unable to maintain her financially in his current condition. She is then given the choice between staying with her husband or separating from him, due to the severity of the harm that will affect her if she remains with him in a state where there is no maintenance—for her—.” (Tahbir Al-Mukhtashar, 3/421)

Imam An-Nawawi from the Shafi'i school stated:

فِي ثُبُوتِ الْفَسْخِ بِهِ فَإِذَا عَجَزَ الزَّوْجُ عَنِ الْقِيَامِ بِمُؤَنِ الزَّوْجَةِ الْمُوَظَّفَةِ عَلَيْهِ، فَالَّذِي نَصَّ عَلَيْهِ الشَّافِعِيُّ - رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ - فِي كُتُBِهِ قَدِيمًا وَجَدِيدًا أَنَّهَا بِالْخِيَارِ إِنْ شَاءَتْ صَبَرَتْ وَأَنْفَقَتْ مِنْ مَالِهَا أَوِ اقْتَرَضَتْ وَأَنْفَقَتْ عَلَى نَفْسِهَا وَنَفَقَتُهَا فِي ذِمَّتِهِ إِلَى أَنْ يُوسِرَ، وَإِنْ شَاءَتْ طَلَبَتْ فَسْخَ النِّكَاحِ، وَقَالَ فِي بَعْضِ كُتُبِهِ بَعْدَ ذِكْرِ هَذَا: وَقَدْ قِيلَ لَا خِيَارَ لَهَا وَلِلْأَصْحَابِ طَرِيقَانِ: أَحَدُهُمَا: الْقَطْعُ بِأَنَّ لَهَا حَقَّ الْفَسْخِ... فَالْمَذْهَبُ ثُبُوتُ الْفَسْخِ

“Regarding the validation of fasakh (annulment of marriage) due to it: if the husband is unable to provide the maintenance prescribed upon him for the wife, then what was explicitly stated by As-Shafi'i—may Allah be pleased with him—in his books, both old and new, is that she has a choice. If she wishes, she can remain patient and spend from her own wealth, or borrow and spend on herself, and her maintenance remains a debt upon his responsibility until he attains ease. And if she wishes, she can request the fasakh of the marriage. As-Shafi'i said in some of his books after mentioning this: 'And it has been said she has no choice.' The companions of the school have two paths; one of them is the absolute certainty that she has the right to fasakh... Thus, the official position of the school is the validation of fasakh.” (Raudhah At-Thalibin, 9/72)

Imam Ibnu Qudamah from the Hanbali school stated:

وَجُمْلَتُهُ أَنَّ الرَّجُلَ إذَا مَنَعَ امْرَأَتَهُ النَّفَقَةَ لِعُسْرَتِهِ وَعَدَمِ مَا يُنْفِقُهُ، فَالْمَرْأَةُ مُخَيَّرَةٌ بَيْنَ الصَّبْرِ عَلَيْهِ وَبَيْنَ فِرَاقِهِ. وَرُوِيَ نَحْوُ ذَلِكَ عَنْ عُمَرَ وَعَلِيٍّ وَأَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ

“In general, if a man withholds maintenance from his wife due to his financial hardship and lack of anything to spend, the woman is given a choice between being patient with him or separating from him. A similar view has been narrated from Umar, Ali, and Abu Hurairah.” (Al-Mughni, 8/204)

Abu Az-Zinad narrated:

سَأَلْتُ سَعِيدَ بْنَ الْمُسَيِّبِ عَنِ الرَّجُلِ لَا يَجِدُ مَا يُنْفِقُ عَلَى امْرَأَتِهِ أَيُفَرَّقُ بَيْنَهُمَا؟ قَالَ: نَعَمْ قُلْتُ: سُنَّةٌ؟ قَالَ: سُنَّةٌ

“I asked Sa’id bin Al-Musayyib about a man who finds nothing to spend on his wife, can they be separated? He replied, 'Yes.' I asked, '(Is that) sunnah?' He replied, 'Sunnah.'” (Narrated by Sa’id bin Manshur: 2022)

The Compilation of Islamic Law (Kompilasi Hukum Islam / KHI) applicable in this country also accommodates the right to file for divorce if the husband fails to provide maintenance, as stated in KHI Article 116 letter g regarding the violation of the ta'liq thalaq (conditional divorce pledge). The ta'liq thalaq text itself can be found on the back of official marriage certificates.

Nonetheless, we advise that you consider this carefully and with a cool head first. Perform plenty of istikharah prayers and seek counsel from wise and knowledgeable people. Communicate well and politely with your husband first. If he insists on not providing financial support or is unable to do so on the grounds that he has contributed to the house mortgage payments, while you can no longer tolerate being treated this way by him, then feel free to file for a divorce, as you have the right to do so. However, if he is willing to commit to providing support, shifting his perspective and behavior regarding nafkah, and strives to make a living for you, then it is better to maintain the marriage. After all, he doesn't forbid you from working and leaving the house, does he? This means that although he is unable to provide nafkah, he does not block you from fulfilling your own life necessities. You can even fulfill the needs of your parents. However, if you feel that you are the one financially supporting your husband and that he has abandoned his duties as a husband to you for years, then the option to separate can be taken into consideration. Wallahu a’lam.